Through Schmidt's eyes
by ParisLove9
Summary: See the world through Schmidt's eyes, starting off with the worst day of his life.
1. I feel off today

Schmidt woke up feeling strange, the room seemed different, yet oddly the same. Nothing was out of place, everything looked correct, yet he felt like it was wrong. He stood up and made his way to the door, his nose filled with a sweet smell wafting in from the kitchen, What was that? He opened the door and found himself face to back with Jessica Day. She was talking to Winston about something, both of them in their pajamas, acting oddly secretive.

"Oh hi Schmidt" Winston greeted him, sounding a little off.

"Hey" Jess turned around quickly. Both of these people looked normal, yet weirdly new to Schmidt.

"Hello" Schmidt smiled, trying to hide his confusion. "What is that sweet aroma?"

"Candle" Jess blurted out, abandoning them and hurrying to her room. Leaving Winston and Schmidt alone.

"Well...You see" Winston smiled "Jess dropped a bottle of rosé and it shattered, leaking the sent everywhere."

"What!" Schmidt exclaimed, "She spilled her bath water poison all over my palace!"

"Um..I guess" Winston muttered, making his way to his room.

Schmidt honestly didn't care that Jess spilled some rosé, I mean Nick spilled beer all the time. He still felt weird, like something else had been spilled over his life..but what? Schmidt made his way down the hall, passing Jess's room, hearing the sound of Taylor Swift through her door. Passing Nick's room, the scent of beer inhaling him as he scurried past. Passing Winston's room, his eyes meeting Ferguson's, he then found the bathroom. Nick at the sink, brushing his teeth. Winston washing his hands. Jess in the shower. Schmidt smiled at his friends.

"Hello" Schmidt announced

"Hey" Winston responded. Nick muttered something, and Jess said nothing.

"My boys" Schmidt laughed, walking over to them. "I find myself feeling a little off today, and I think you know what will help with that."

"Sex" Winston turned around, to dry his hands. Nick spit in the sink and then spoke,

"Alcohol" Nick smiled.

"Guys" Schmidt yelled "No sex, no alcohol...just good old fashioned-"

"Don't say it Schmidt" Nick warned

"Shopping" Schmidt's face light up as the words escaped his mouth. He loved to shop it always made him feel better, and today he was feeling very off and needed some better.

"Yes!" Winston exclaimed, a goofy expression plastered on his face. "I need to buy cat food for my little man"

"Winston!" Schmidt screamed "No!...We are going clothing shopping, not god dang hillbilly cat food shopping."

"Chill man" Winston responded.

"Can I come?" Jess emerged soaking wet from the shower, her dripping hair placed perfectly on her pale skin. Her big blue eyes shimmering in the water. Schmidt watched as Nick's jaw dropped, trying not to stare..but Nick was kind of in love with this girl so that was hard.

"Of course" Schmidt smiled "Just put some clothes on, preferably a large coat."

"It's ninety-five degrees outside Schmidt..I will not be wearing a coat." Jess laughed, making her way out the door.

"Dude!" Schmidt punched Nick's arm

"What?" Nick came back to earth, looking confused.

"You just stared at Jess for I don't know...way to long unless you are planning on killing her!" Schmidt yelled

"Give him a break Schmidt, he loves her...what do you want him to do?" Winston said as he left the room.

"Oh I don't know...tell her." Schmidt rolled his eyes

"Really?" Nick laughed "Are we going there?"

"Sure why not?" Schmidt smirked

"Cece" Nick stood his ground. "Have you told Cece that you are crazy in love with her?"

"Not the same" Schmidt muttered

"What was that?" Nick laughed

"Cece is a goddess Nick...Jess, Jess is just a girl, a normal girl, that anyone can get."

"No Schmidt" Nick growled "Jess is amazing, smart, beautiful, funny...she is perfect and I am way below her...she is better than me."

"You can't be bellow her, she...she is a teacher who sings all day and drinks Rosé."

"Yeah, well I am a bartender who drinks all day and can't even accomplish my one goal of writing a good book." Nick smirked, and then pushed past Schmidt, leaving the room.

Later that day, at about seven at night Schmidt, Nick, Winston, Jess and Cece walked down the street. They had been shopping for hours. Nick and Winston empty handed, Schmidt had many bags full of things he didn't need, as well did Cece, and Jess had one new dress. They walked, and talked. Nick watching Jess lovingly as they walked through the street, Winston on his phone, Schmidt and Cece talking, none of them noticing as a big bus came towards them, hurling down the street with no sign of stopping.

"Move!" Nick yelled, pushing Jess away, the bus smashing into him full force, blood painting Jess's face, as she screamed. Winston, Schmidt and Cece were all ahead and already out of the street, but as they turned around they all saw. Jess on the ground, covered in blood, screaming her lungs out, and then Nick...laying lifeless in front of the bus, blood all around him. Cece ran to Jess as fast as she could, Winston dialing nine one one. People surrounding them, the bus driver screaming, saying he didn't see them. Only then..in all the commotion did Schmidt realize why he felt so weird all day, because it was the day his best friend was to die, and the world was trying to tell him all day.


	2. I blame myself

Schmidt paced back and forth through the waiting room of the hospital. Jess needed stitches, from getting pushed so they all went with her. Cece was with Jess, Winston and Schmidt in the waiting room. Schmidt's heartfelt broken, worse than anything he had ever felt. Worse than any breakup, worse than his father leaving him, worse than anything that could ever happen...Nick was dead, like really dead. Gone.

Schmidt watched as Winston sipped his coffee, and as a nurse ran past him yelling something. He watched all this, yet felt as though he wasn't even there. It had been a few hours since Nick got hit by the bus. After that they had to talk to some cops about what they saw, and then they came here, Jess had been in there a while. Soon Cece walked into the room, Schmidt watched her come to him, sadness in her eyes.

"Hi" She smiled, trying to be happy, but failing. Schmidt didn't respond..and neither did Winston.

"Jess needed stitches on her left arm, and her hand" Cece told them. "She should be out any second."

They stood there in silence until Jess came into the room. Schmidt watched her, her eyes blood shot, her face tear stained, her skin and clothes painted blood red, from Nick. Schmidt looked at her arm, stitched came from her hand all the way up to her elbow...looked painful.

"Can we go?" Jess sniffled, sounding empty.

"Yeah, let's go" Cece smiled, her arm placing itself around Jess. All of them making their way home in complete silence, all of them had the same person filling their minds, yet nobody spoke.

Later that day the group was home, Winston on the couch, drinking a beer. Jess in the shower which she had to wrap her arm up to do, and Schmidt sitting on his bed sadly. Schmidt let his mind wander to Nick. The day they met, the day they moved into the loft. Nick's crooked smile sipping from a beer bottle. Nick watching Jess, Schmidt felt awful at the thought that Nick never got to tell Jess how he felt, Schmidt felt as though someone had to. He made his way down the hall, and to the bathroom were Jess was. He opened the door to find Jess on the floor, leaning on the wall crying, wet and dripping blood.

"Hey" Schmidt sat by her "Did you shower?"

"I tried...but the blood , It..it started to drip into my eyes, and...I, I..I lost it and I couldn't keep showering." Jess cried, as Schmidt took her in his arms.

"I know it hurts" Schmidt whispered "I am hurting too...how about we get you some clothes."

"Why?" Jess held Schmidt as tight as she could

"Well because you are just in a towel, and you must be cold."

"Sure" Jess responded

"Good" Schmidt helped her up, and to her room. Jess let herself fall to the bed, Schmidt searching her room for something to wear. Finding some pajamas, placing them by Jess.

"Thanks" Jess whispered, as Schmidt left the room.

Schmidt found himself in Nick's room, his eyes wandering to a picture of Nick. He made his way to it, wrapping it in his hands, staring at Nick.

"Nick" Schmidt smiled "We had some good years man...eleven good years, of beer, girls and just fun. I wish I never made you go shopping with me, then everything would be cool. You would be fine."

"Schmidt" Winston entered the room "I had thirty years with Nick, and he was my best friend...I'm going to miss him too."

"I'm sorry" Schmidt placed the picture down, Winston walking closer to him.

"No reason to be..Not your fault" Winston smiled

"Yeah it is..It was my idea to go out"

"Hey" Winston wrapped his arms around Schmidt "It is not your fault...it is nobody's fault Schmidt. Nick was a great guy, a guy who did nothing but drink and work and obsess over Jess. A guy who was our best friend, and if we knew what was going to happen if we let him come with us, then we wouldn't have left the house. Schmidt don't blame yourself, because if Nick was the one here, and you were gone, no way in hell you want him blaming himself..so guess what, he doesn't want you blaming yourself either."


	3. My memories are killing me

Schmidt watched himself in the mirror, he looked nice, a custom made black suit, a fresh hair cut, but he couldn't care less about how he looked, because today was Nick Miller's funeral, and all he could think of was Nick. He held a Raman package in his hand, the same kind him and Nick used to eat. Schmidt never enjoyed funerals, he hated seeing dead people, he hated being near them, he hated everything about them. And with the thought that Nick was going to be in that coffin filling Schmidt's mind, the whole thing seemed even worse. Schmidt was trying not to think about it, but finding that impossible. 

Winston sipped from a bottle of beer, he was hoping to get drunk enough that he wouldn't have to think of the fact that in just a little while he would be watching as Nick got buried six feet under. The thought sickened him, he couldn't even comprehend that Nick was gone, that the guy who he grew up with, met as a child and stayed friends with his entire life was gone. Winston had known Nick forever, he knew Nick when he was seven and his dad let him taste some beer and he hated it, he knew Nick when he was ten and he got his first crush and then experienced his first rejection, he knew Nick when he was sixteen and he crashed his mom's car when he was learning how to drive, and he knew Nick when he was thirty three and a city bus ran him over and killed him right in front of his best friends. Winston wanted to block out the last memory he had of Nick, he wanted to remember the better ones...but was finding it almost impossible.

Jess sat on her bed, tears filling her ocean eyes, and pain filling her dying heart. She felt like her life had ended the second that Nick's did, she felt broken..so broken that nobody was going to be able to fix her. She felt alone, Schmidt seemed so different and sad, Winston's happy side, lovable crazy Winston seemed to have faded away, and Cece and Coach weren't there. Cece couldn't afford to fly there, and Coach wasn't in their hotel room but he was going to be at the funeral. Jess had kept a secret from everyone, including Nick...she was in love with him. She knew that she loved him when they went to the beach a few months after she moved in and stayed the whole night. Jess just saw a new side of Nick that day, a side she never knew was there, and that made her fall for him like crazy. She hide her love for years, hoping that if Nick loved her back then he would tell her..which was a bad plan considering how Nick is with feelings. Jess felt dead inside now that Nick was gone, he never knew how she felt and she wished he had, because now she will never know if he loved her back, and was just scared to say it.


	4. I won't cry, Unless you love me

Jessica Day watched as people said great things about Nick, she watched as family and friends cried for him, she watched as his mom fell apart and broke down, she even watched as they buried him six feet below the surface, and she never cried. She wasn't letting herself cry, she couldn't because if she let just one tear escape...then she would never stop crying. The thought that she would never hear his voice again tore her apart, she could feel her heart breaking into a million little pieces, but she wasn't going to cry. She couldn't let herself do that, so she ignored her feelings as long as she could, which ended when Nick's mother came over to her.

"Hello" She greeted Jess sadly.

"Hi" Jess faked a smile. "I'm sorry for your loss"

"And I am sorry for yours" She responded "I know that he cared for you deeply, and I wish he could have told you that."

"I know he cared" Jess smiled slightly "He was one of my best friends"

"Yes I know...but he loved you, as more than that" She took Jess's hand.

"He did?" Jess barely made out

"He would be so mad if I told you this...but I think you should know, he told me once that he loved you. That you were the one, but he was so scared that you didn't love him back so he never told you."

"I wish he would have told me that" Jess finally let the tears escape. "I love him, and if he had just told me that he loved me too. I, I, I'm so sorry."

"For what dear?"

"He never knew how much I cared" Jess cried.

"Yes he did, he knew you cared for him...and I thank you for that, for taking care of him...he really needed it." She wrapped Jess in her arms. Jess let herself fall into her.


End file.
